Mother has lived with us for the past 12 years. While at her doctor's appointment we were advise that she get a POA in place. She wanted Rebecca (my wife, her daughter) to be Attorney in Fact (POA) with no agents and stated that she did not want her other 2 daughters involved in her finances. Now they want full disclosure of all her finances. The 1 daughter stepped up at the 11th hour and did home care for her in Fla. for about 26 months. She was paid very well for that task. Prior to that, very little family contact. The other sister who started this has had almost no contact with me or mother. For the past several years she never once offered to watch mother for a few hours or have her at her house (8 minutes away) to give my husband and I a little break. We have been caring for mother since 2010 when she moved here and 2001 when she lived in Cicero upon my dad's death. I would have welcomed help from them with open arms and certainly answer any financial questions while I was POA. We live in New York state.
No, you don't owe anyone anything from the past. Just ignore such requests.
What IS owed not is that the executor, whomever that is, carries out the will as it is written.
Hopefully that is being done.
The rest is he-said/she-said and total nonsense.
However her request is what is called ‘a fishing expedition’. She wants you to provide the information to prove the case that will increase her share. She can’t make you do this, but a court could – IF she starts proceedings (a civil case, not a criminal prosecution) and convinces the court that there is something in it.
The advice to pay the bills is sound, they have to be paid whether Sis is right or not. You don’t have to respond to the fishing expedition unless you want to, which you might perhaps choose to do in order to stop allegations and gossip. I’d suggest that you say that you aren't required to provide information but are willing to help. Ask her for details of what information she wants, what dates, what types of transactions, what amounts, and why. Put her on the back foot, and find out if she has any ideas about what if anything might be wrong. You can chose to answer then, it’s up to you. Don't jump, but don't duck either. Keep it cool!
"Not obligated
A Power of Attorney (POA) is not obligated to share private financial information with anyone they wish. Sharing such information may violate the POA's duty of loyalty to the principal13. A valid POA can access the principal's financial accounts, file taxes, make investment decisions, and collect debts on behalf of the principal2.
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If she had a will and her POA was also her executor, that person would already have the information that they need regarding assets and liabilities. In this case, there is no will.
State law may vary, but I would expect that while the erstwhile POA isn’t required to share transaction information from the principal’s lifetime, she would share asset and liability information with whoever is legally responsible for handling the estate, unless she seeks and obtains that authority herself.
Some liability information may result in some transaction information becoming known, e.g., payroll taxes due on wages paid to sister in Florida.
Legal advice is an excellent idea when deciding how to deal with an intestate estate.
She does NOT have to share anything with her sisters. Legally. Morally, another story.
My DH just finished his run as his mom's executor. He kept a spreadsheet of all expenditures and income. He shared it with his sibs. They worked together to sell things, clear the house, etc.
He full well knew he didn't HAVE to tell his sibs anything, but he chose to.
Actually, since her death, POA ends. Who is her executor? If it's Rebecca, then she goes on as before, paying & clearing up debts & selling properties, etc.
At this point, POA means nothing. When the estate is liquidated, all the money issues should come out and be addressed.
Inheritances are paid acc to the literal will of the person who has passed. My BIL did next to nothing for either his mom or dad, yet inherited the exact same amount of money, since that's what his parents wanted. It doesn't matter how much one person has done or not...it's all about how the will is stated.
Get legal advice to navigate this.
So mom is dead, right? And mom long ago sold her home as she was either living with you / hubs or that daughter in FL, right? So all mom could have had is $ from house sale, savings and her mo income?
Has / Is probate going to be opened & is there a valid will? Like are there actually assets that need NYS probate court for them to be dealt with? If so whomever named to be the Executor is the person who has to deal with all this IF probate is opened.
Otherwise imo it’s all a lot of noise and a buttrash of bother.
Ive been an Executor more than once, and sat in more than one courthouse….. one thing that holds true is that the will is more often than not an “artifact”. It is a representation of what their life and finances were at that period of time. And family and supposed be airs have had expectations that they are due a lil windfall. But life and its co$t$ go on. The elders life, especially their last decade or two, is nothing but outflow for $ & assets. If their only income is SSA retirement income, that is maybe 30K a yr. There sadly ends up very little left of value to place into an Estate left once they die.
Our experience may be a word to the wise for those approaching or in early retirement. If you can, plan financially for a longer life span than you anticipate (or even desire).
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