I'm now responsible for three people's jobs. The state supreme court just announced that they have formed a task force to address abuse, fraud, etc. for the elderly. I sent them an email about protecting caregivers' too, and they responded to me!!! They want me to write them a letter and there was mention of hearings, to hear first hand from individuals. I have been sick for 3 weeks out of 4. I am tired to say the least. I need to find someone that can help me put this letter together. I need someone that knows what it is like to be a caregiver while working full-time. I need someone that will know how to address, communicate, with supreme court judges. Does anyone have any suggestions? I can foresee myself being taken out of the office in a stretcher in the future.
Talk to your union representative. See if job sharing is an option, just make sure you do not loose your insurance coverage if you went to part time. Maybe one of the support staff who used to work with you gets insurance through a spouse, and you can work enough hours to keep yours. I would not talk to the bosses, they might see this as you advising them you are unable to perform your job tasks.
And yes, they might be forcing you out. From their point of view, frequent absences are disruptive, and expensive (they pay your benefits even if you are not there working, when you take sick time they pay you and the person who is covering you...etc.) Never the less, I think a company needs to earn the employee's loyalty. You seem to have great skills in their minds if you are able to do three jobs. With your union rep, maybe you can leverage these skills in a way that says you are committed to making the company work well. Offer them what they might need, and there might be wiggle room for compromise.
If you mom has money, hire a "granny nanny" to take over some functions from you. After all, that is what she earned her money for, to take care of her in her old age. Unless you have billions, it is sadly no longer about leaving a family inheritance. The cost of things has increased too much over time. Talk to an elder estate attorney if there is land or home in this. They can find a way to protect those things. Don't mess up your future (insurance, health, pension, social security benefits that you will need to live on when you are old). She sounds pretty functional currently. Let helpers help.
There is also a petition on right now to help caregivers get their social security benefits while they are out of work or having to cut hours,and for those who have had to stop working that would provide ss benefits to caregivers. It is :thepetitionsite/takeaction/769/176/399/
Also if your state has a Health Science Center that has a medical school & biomedical sciences graduate programs, perhaps contact them too. The medical school will have a gerontology program for the MD's but there also could be others like MD / MPH duals that need to do masters thesis within that speciality too.This time of the year is ideal as classes just started so the students are getting with their advisors to identify possible thesis. Your needs almost are a gift with a bow on it as the project timeframe can easily be done with a 2 year master's program and there is existing legislation & existing program data for them to workup for the background part of the thesis. Good luck.
FMLA doesn't apply to every business. The business needs to have 50 or more employees. Some employers might have an employee insurance, such as Aflac, which pays part of your salary while you are using FMLA.
In my case, I didn't use any of my FMLA for caring for my parents, I used my vacation time and sick leave, and non-paid time off. Thank goodness I didn't use FMLA because I needed it for myself when I was diagnosed with a serious illness and had to take a couple months off from work, then after that work half time using half day FMLA.
Can mom afford to hire some in home care a few hrs a week? Can the dr order PT or nursing care a few days a week?
Take care of you and don't do anything that interferes with your job -- your job with its benefits are most important. If mom is doing better, consider that a blessing. Build on that and help her get the assistance she needs, even if that means moving to AL. She may be eligible for VA spousal financial help, etc to afford the residential costs.
Good luck. Remember take care of you first. Stay employed. Employers can be empathic, but they have a business to run...so you too have to make decision as to if you want to be a caregiver or keep your job, or find a job with flexibility to tend to mom and still be employed. Remember, caring for mom will just get harder and more demanding. Will you be able to keep this up?
We found Mom a nice facility that took her in as private pay, and when her funds run out, she can convert to Medicaid. She is no longer complaining about "staring at the four walls".
if you prepare something for your state supreme court id like to see the function of aps changed to an agency for advice and help as opposed to the hateful , strongarm tactics they now use . you cant even phone them , part of their strategy is to keep you squirming and that is added stress to a job thats already stressful enough . i think aps should answer to the primary caregiver and stop this death by silence bullshit that they are known for ..
As for Medicare coving costs, you will need to check with Medicare [medicare.gov], and your Mom's secondary insurance if she has one.
On a positive note, one thing I had noticed is a large jump in the number of newspaper articles regarding elders and Caregivers here in our local newspaper, the Washington Post, which is read by U.S. Congress.
With the first wave of baby boomers reaching retirement age that demographic age-group is going to spike, and society needs to have in place things to help us.
I know in my area there is an upswing in building new retirement villages [55+ and older], and new nursing homes and rehab centers. So someone is taking notice.
Caregivers need more help. It is almost impossible for one person to work three shifts at home caring for a loved one who is on a different pattern than the rest of the world [up all night].
We need a reality show that deals with Caregiving [similar to the Hoarding shows that have many elder hoarders] as these shows bring to light what is happening.