I've posted before I have a very dysfunctional family situation, my mother is in hospital again for the third time this month, once a fall,once a UTI and again Uti not getting better, I lived with her and her husband for a year, to help them and get on my feet as I was transitioning living situation, it appeared the whole time I was there my mother refused to cooperate to get better she laid bed bound and I waited on her hand and foot, she also didn't want to deal with her husband who is a very difficult personality, it felt like I was the surrogate wife and she did nothing to improve her situation and he was bitter, yet he guarded her like a watchdog and gave me limited access to their room to help her, he also followed me around and watched my every move, I finally got a place and went no contact because they got upset I was leaving and said some horrible things, I have a crazy brother who would call everyday And want to know my every move too, fast forward her husband is now I'm memory care, she had remained home for a few weeks with my brother checking in, I went to help for a few days, both mother and brother Asked but could not take the dysfunction with her and my brother and left, I overheard a conversation between them that since I change her diapers then I could get my rent paid and stay there, that blew my mind they think so little of me I basically told them I'm done, set my mother up with a caregiver ( she refused) so now here we go again she's back in the hospital, I'm her poa and executer my brother is not because he has a shady past with business and could have the IRS on his tail, so house is in my name tod deed, I don't want to resign poa because she will have no one to make decisions, and will be a ward of the state, although my liar brother said he was going to move in with her ( no job, can't even get social security because he worked under the table) I just want to wash my hands of it all and resign the house back to her and her husband, they will use it for there care anyway, and resign poa if I must, at this point they are ready for snl, I want to be there to help, but they have so little regard for me it won't matter, also I get high blood pressure and cannot sleep for days after just one visit with them, the triggers I get are pretty bad I'm a senior myself, lost my daughter to a car crash four years ago they barely were there for me, I don't expect there sympathy but a family doesn't go hard on a grieving person like they did, anyway I'm rambling on, life is short I have one son to love and cherish, although they were against me wanting to be in his life saying he's old enough to be on his own, ( I moved closer to him) I feel like I'm in a nightmare thanks for listening
And now you are trying to move forward rebuilding your life and enjoying being close to your remaining child, but are dealing with all the dysfunctional and ungrateful behaviors from your mom, brother and stepfather. Wow.
How old is your mom? Is she still bed bound? And does she have any cognitive impairment? If not, could you resign your POA, etc. and let her and her husband figure it out? You matter too and you shouldn’t have to be caregiving ungrateful people who make callous comments.