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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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My step mom is a very horrible person and is just after the bank account. Before my dad died last year, he said my grandma would never go into a home even if he had to move in with her. How can I block this move or hold it off a bit?
yourflyguy, could you tell us who is current taking care of your Grandmother? And what are your Grandmother's health conditions? Any dementia?
Was your Step-Mom caring for your Dad before he passed last year? If yes, then she is still grieving the lost of the love of her life. So sorry for your Dad's passing. Now your Step-Mom is trying to take care or has been taking care of your Dad's mother.
That is a lot for one person to do, do Aides come in to help her? If not, then Step-Mom probably is physically and emotionally exhausted. Has anyone been helping her? If not, then I can fully understand why your Step-Mom now feels that your Grandmother needs a HIGHER skilled place to take care of her.
There isn't anything terrible about be in a continuing care facility. Both my parents were in one. Thus, there are 3 shifts of caregivers every day..... right now your Step-Mom is probably doing the work of all 3 daily caregivers. Can you see how exhausting that can be?
Your Step-Mom is after her Mother-in-law's bank account if she puts her into a nursing home? Seriously?? Do you have any idea how much it cost to be in a nursing home? For my own Mom it was costing my Dad $12k per month, yes per month. That would wipe out Grandmother's bank account, so taking money is NOT what you should be thinking.
Why would your grandma give your terrible awful stepmom POA?
Is Stepmom draining Grandma's bank account, or your dad's? Do you have evidence this is happening? Who is handling GM's affairs? Paying her taxes, insurance, house upkeep, etc? I assume this is horrid stepmom, since she is POA. How can you sort out what is being legitimately used for GM's care, and what Stepmom is stealing for herself?
You father said he would move in with your GM before he would let her go to a home. But he is dead. Is there someone else volunteering to move in with her? Are you?
About what GM wanted/doesn't want ... we don't always get to choose when it comes to health.
I never aspired to a medical career. I never ever wanted to give myself (or anyone else) shots. Then I developed diabetes. I now give myself 5 shots a day. Do I want to? Not exactly, but I am glad for the opportunity to stave off complications. I don't want to give myself shots, but even more than that I don't want to lose my foot or a leg or my vision.
As loving caregivers many of us have had to do something that our loved ones never wanted done. But those loved ones never wanted dementia or copd or cancer, etc either. We simply don't always have choices when it comes to our health.
I think jjariz is right about what it will take to fight this. (Recognize that these steps will cost money.) If you did become GM's legal guardian, what would be the first thing you would do?
Just want to clarify...GMa assigned your stepmom POA? Or she assigned your Dad and SM second? Or is SM assuming that she can take over where Dad left off. If Gma Didn't legally assign SM then SM is not POA.
If she puts Gma in a NH all Gmas assets have to pay for her care. If SM uses any of it for personal reasons it will effect Medicaid if ever needed.
Step mom has probably already drained the bank account, but when she applies for medicaid to cover Grandma's care she is in for a big surprise. medicaid will demand to know where the money is!!!!!!!!!
Agree Gma is probably better off without stepmom's care.
If you want to fight it, you will need to hire an attorney and file for guardianship for grandma and be prepared to take care of her. You can't force step-mom to continue to care for her.
Well, I would first ask what you would propose as an alternative. Who is caring for your grandmother now? What are the options? If your stepmom has POA, she doesn't need to put your grandma in a home to get at the bank account. In fact it would probably be cheaper to keep her at home than to pay a facility for her care. Your stepmom may be a horrible person but this may still be the best option for your grandma.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Was your Step-Mom caring for your Dad before he passed last year? If yes, then she is still grieving the lost of the love of her life. So sorry for your Dad's passing. Now your Step-Mom is trying to take care or has been taking care of your Dad's mother.
That is a lot for one person to do, do Aides come in to help her? If not, then Step-Mom probably is physically and emotionally exhausted. Has anyone been helping her? If not, then I can fully understand why your Step-Mom now feels that your Grandmother needs a HIGHER skilled place to take care of her.
There isn't anything terrible about be in a continuing care facility. Both my parents were in one. Thus, there are 3 shifts of caregivers every day..... right now your Step-Mom is probably doing the work of all 3 daily caregivers. Can you see how exhausting that can be?
Your Step-Mom is after her Mother-in-law's bank account if she puts her into a nursing home? Seriously?? Do you have any idea how much it cost to be in a nursing home? For my own Mom it was costing my Dad $12k per month, yes per month. That would wipe out Grandmother's bank account, so taking money is NOT what you should be thinking.
Is Stepmom draining Grandma's bank account, or your dad's? Do you have evidence this is happening? Who is handling GM's affairs? Paying her taxes, insurance, house upkeep, etc? I assume this is horrid stepmom, since she is POA. How can you sort out what is being legitimately used for GM's care, and what Stepmom is stealing for herself?
You father said he would move in with your GM before he would let her go to a home. But he is dead. Is there someone else volunteering to move in with her? Are you?
About what GM wanted/doesn't want ... we don't always get to choose when it comes to health.
I never aspired to a medical career. I never ever wanted to give myself (or anyone else) shots. Then I developed diabetes. I now give myself 5 shots a day. Do I want to? Not exactly, but I am glad for the opportunity to stave off complications. I don't want to give myself shots, but even more than that I don't want to lose my foot or a leg or my vision.
As loving caregivers many of us have had to do something that our loved ones never wanted done. But those loved ones never wanted dementia or copd or cancer, etc either. We simply don't always have choices when it comes to our health.
I think jjariz is right about what it will take to fight this. (Recognize that these steps will cost money.) If you did become GM's legal guardian, what would be the first thing you would do?
If she puts Gma in a NH all Gmas assets have to pay for her care. If SM uses any of it for personal reasons it will effect Medicaid if ever needed.
Agree Gma is probably better off without stepmom's care.