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My husband is 83 years old, sleeps many hours each day, has very weak legs and has fallen & had to call paramedics to get him up. Should he be admitted to assisted living for physical therapy for his weak legs. He has dementia and is insulin dependent diabetic & 6 stents in his heart.


I need help and do not know who to contact and do not know if he should be placed into an assisted living for physical therapy. He had been in a Rehab. facility for 5 weeks because of falling, when he was discharged, there was little to no progress with his very weak legs. His balance is not good either. He has a general walker, this is only a small help for him.


I do not know what to do about making a decision for him for help for his very weak legs and poor balance and who to contact in the Fond du Lac, WI area.

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At your husband's age, and given he has diabetes it is likely that his weak legs have a combination of causes that won't be fixed in rehab, especially with his dementia preventing real participation in exercises and such ongoing. There is also with age such a lot of imbalance that happens. If 5 weeks in rehab didn't help I doubt rehab is the answer. You don't tell us your own age, but I am assuming you are at least in your 60s. Your husband is also weakened enough and advanced enough that sleep is his preferred activity (not unusual). I think that your husband would do better now in placement and that it is almost crucial for you. I understand that he "doesn't want to go there", because quite honestly I think Forum hasn't seen a case where an elder did want to. It is the sad fact that not everything can be fixed or prevented. Some things must be dealt with. I think that given his advanced condition any placement in Assisted Living will be very costly. I can recommend that you try places more "homey" and smaller, with smaller more familiar staff dealing with fewer residents, such as board and care. There are many companies now that will take you to visit. It will be necessary to see a lawyer to work on separation of assets to pay for your husband's care that doesn't rob you of what you need to live on. It is all complicated and will take time, but I think you entered stage 1 here you recognize that your ability to handle all this is now less. All of this said, it will do no harm to see the doctor and speak to him about the possibility of rehab.
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Have you been told by a medical professional that his legs are weak?

I went through the same thing with a family member that is in a nursing facility. Every time he would get up to walk, he would have poor balance and fall. (he has dementia as well)

They thought it was due to him being weak, however, it was later determined to be something else.
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AlvaDeer Sep 2020
So right, Haley. Often it is balance. Especially with aqe and dementia. Or a combo. And of course the weakness and muscle wasting when muscles aren't used, the changes in ligaments stretching. It's never simple.
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Alvadeer

You are so right. Muscle wasting.
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