My 87-year-old mother with mild cognitive impairment was taken from the assisted living facility (ALF) where she resided for the past 12 months in July by my sister. She was taken out of the facility for "lunch" by someone who said she was a friend. It was not a "friend" but an imposter posing as a friend from church. While Mom was out to lunch with the "friend", my sister showed up at the ALF, stating she was moving her out and had POA. She was not aware that my POA superceded hers. She demanded Mom's meds but they did not release them to her as my POA was current. Sister left with just a few bits of clothing, (all of her furniture and personal effects are still there) met the imposter who had my Mom and left for the airport. Airport security was notified and Mom was willing to go with my sister, but stated that she didn't know what was happening until 2 hours prior. Nothing could be done.
Since then, Mom was taken to a lawyer to revoke my POA the day after she was taken. I have been working with a fiduciary who tried to mediate the situation with Mom's lawyer to no avail as he believed she had capacity to make a decision. Since then, Mom's bank accounts have been closed, $34K has been withdrawn and her pension ACH deposit accounts have been changed.
I contacted law enforcement, APS in the county where she was removed from as well as the county where I believe she currently resides. The actual address of my sister's boyfriend's home will not be disclosed. I have spoken to Mom but only via my sister's cell phone or the boyfriend's land line. They refuse to plug in the wireless phone I purchased for Mom so she could retain her old phone #. I have contacted an attorney regarding conservatorship which sounds like an agonizing process.
Has anyone out there experienced a similar situation and what have you done? Do I let it the elder abuse and manipulation happen at this point and wait until more is done? Any advice is appreciated.
In those circumstances, and with examination, a lawyer would allow/could assist Mom to change her POA, which it sounds as though she had done. Mom would also be able to make the decision to move to live with your sister, who apparently wishes to care for her in her own home. Since Mom has moved and now lives with sister it would be normal that accounts are drawn into banking facilities in their own town.
Long and short, I honestly am not certain what you could do at this point. Your mother does have rights, and it sounds as though she is still making her own choices.
Certainly you should pass this by an Elder Law Attorney if you have questions, because there are a lot of smart folks on the forum with knowledge about Estate Management, Law, Real Estate and many other things. But we aren't advisors on anything legal and every legal situation is unique.
As to knowing that all is well, I would write a nice letter to both your Mom and your sister, asking for a family meeting; I would then visit them, make certain that Mom is happy where she is, and offer what support I was able to provide them both before moving on.