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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Can't remember anyone, Doesn't remember the way we do things...been doing things same for 2 years....will only eat a few certain things, has always been self centered, and at 92, how much longer will she live?
Barbyjwil50, any time a parent moves in with a grown child what happens is the adult/child dynamic. That means your Mom has taken over the adult role and you are once again the child. So doing things her way is the only right way. Any chance of following her advice just to humor her and make life a bit calmer?
When someone is older they don't burn a lot of energy, therefore they will not eat as much. Also, as we age we tend to lose our sense of taste. That only thing that still taste good are sugary items. I remember my 90 something Mom's grocery list filled with pies, cookies, chocolate chip muffins, ice cream, etc. and now I know why. Same was happening with my Dad.
You need to walk away from caregiving. It is really unhealthy for both of you if you are wondering when she will die.
Not everyone is able to be a 24/7/365 caregiver. It is okay that you can't keep doing this. What is not okay is continuing without the patients and compassion to take care of another human being.
She deserves to be respected and treated with dignity at this stage of her life. Please advocate for that for her.
Get a new doctor. When I was trying to get a diagnosis for my son after he was born, I saw 2 midwives, my general physician, and 2 pediatricians before I got a diagnosis that I was satisfied with.
Arrogant doctors don’t take the time to listen to you and brush you and your concerns off. My GP took one look at my son and was completely honest and said, “This I have never seen before…. Let’s find out what it is!”
Good doctors know when they don’t know and admit it. If you’re not satisfied with your doctor, get a new one.
How much longer will she live? Well, we have a client who also has nothing wrong with her except for falls risk when mobilising (we walk close by her all the way to her bedroom, but she's so tiny and fragile that it's tempting to pick her up and carry her), and she is about to turn 100.
So don't hold your breath.
It says on your profile that your mother is living at home - do you mean she's been living in your home, for two years?
To be fair, your mother is 92. She may have had two years to get used to how things are done chez you, but then again for 90 years before that she was used to doing it her way. You won't get a diagnosis of dementia based only on her failure to learn and adapt.
At her next exam (for any reason) you can go prepared with a hand-written note that you discretely hand to the staff detailing who you are (in relationship to her) and that you are concerned for her cognitive and memory abilities so to please test her and also to test for a UTI. I did this with my MIL (and I was not the MPoA) and they were glad to accommodate me.
FYI I have a 102-yr old aunt the same as your mom: takes no meds, has no real medical issues. The longest people usually live is to about 117-ish. When I remind her of this she just shakes her head.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Will it change things for either of you do you think?
If I was 92 I guess I'd just eat what I'd like best. Maybe my favorites foods, or foods easiest to chew, digest etc.
What would really help do you think?
When someone is older they don't burn a lot of energy, therefore they will not eat as much. Also, as we age we tend to lose our sense of taste. That only thing that still taste good are sugary items. I remember my 90 something Mom's grocery list filled with pies, cookies, chocolate chip muffins, ice cream, etc. and now I know why. Same was happening with my Dad.
Not everyone is able to be a 24/7/365 caregiver. It is okay that you can't keep doing this. What is not okay is continuing without the patients and compassion to take care of another human being.
She deserves to be respected and treated with dignity at this stage of her life. Please advocate for that for her.
Arrogant doctors don’t take the time to listen to you and brush you and your concerns off. My GP took one look at my son and was completely honest and said, “This I have never seen before…. Let’s find out what it is!”
Good doctors know when they don’t know and admit it. If you’re not satisfied with your doctor, get a new one.
So don't hold your breath.
It says on your profile that your mother is living at home - do you mean she's been living in your home, for two years?
To be fair, your mother is 92. She may have had two years to get used to how things are done chez you, but then again for 90 years before that she was used to doing it her way. You won't get a diagnosis of dementia based only on her failure to learn and adapt.
How did she come to be on your hands?
FYI I have a 102-yr old aunt the same as your mom: takes no meds, has no real medical issues. The longest people usually live is to about 117-ish. When I remind her of this she just shakes her head.