Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I live with my mother and she has a heart condition called angina pectoris and I can see her health deteriorating yet she is very stubborn I can't do anything to convince her she needs medication. What can I do ?
My Aunt had angina for decades and lived a normal life to 96, just taking a medication -- as AlvaDeer said it's very treatable.
I also wonder if she's been in to her doctor (cardiologist) lately? What exactly is she worried about/fearful of or misinformed about? I don't think you'll be able to convince her until you know the root of her refusal.
When the pain of her condition outweighs whatever fear she has of medication, then SHE will beg YOU to take her to the doctor. We all reach a point where we become willing to take arsenic if it promises to provide us with relief from terrible pain.
You also say mom is "scared to go out" which is not something associated with normal "age related decline". Perhaps she's suffering from dementia which affects all logic and judgement in a BIG way.
From the Mayo Clinic: Dementia symptoms vary depending on the cause. Common symptoms include:
Cognitive changes:
Memory loss, which is usually noticed by someone else. Problems communicating or finding words. Trouble with visual and spatial abilities, such as getting lost while driving. Problems with reasoning or problem-solving. Trouble performing complex tasks. Trouble with planning and organizing. Poor coordination and control of movements. Confusion and disorientation.
Psychological changes:
Personality changes. Depression. Anxiety. Agitation. Inappropriate behavior. Being suspicious, known as paranoia. Seeing things that aren't there, known as hallucinations.
This is quite painful. Does your mother have some dementia or is this just a matter of trying to "tough out" angina? If she is diagnosed, then she HAS seen an MD about her chest pain, if I am right? What medications have been prescribed, and do they work at all for her?
You say that you live with Mom and you observe her failing health. Is it only this diagnosis of angina and its consequent pain that Mom and you are dealing with now, or is there more going on?
I sure do wish your Mom good luck. Angina is quite treatable; it's hard to imagine she would choose the pain unless there is some great underlying inability to understand this process or a great fear of MDs in general.
Hope you will update us. If Mom is competent in her own decisions there is really little you can do for her but tell her there IS relief for her condition and you WILL help her avail herself of it. Meanwhile it will be hard for you to differentiate between angina already diagnosed and impending heart attack, so do educate yourself as to symptoms by a bit of online sleuthing, and be ready to call EMS despite Mom in an emergency; let the EMS team assess her.
Tell her that Medicare requires a physical every year to keep her plan. Make an appt. and take her. Act like you are pissed about it too. Sometimes your have to outsmart them.
If mom does not have memory loss then she chooses her health care. My neighbor suffered for a year with chest pain, sweating and shortness of breath. He had an aversion to doctors that even his wife could not convince him to go to the ER. He had passed with a cardiac arrest.
My aunt was diagnosed with heart failure and chose to not take any meds. She actually asked me to find a way to set up hospice. She pased within a week on her terms.
Speak to her without intense drama and ask her about her final wishes
Why do think she’s being stubborn about visiting a doctor? Is it fear? When is the last time she went? I would be concerned about her not taking care of herself.
I say this because my family has a history of heart disease and it’s important to see a cardiologist regularly.
Do you think that she would agree to an online visit? My doctor started doing online visits during Covid. I think in some cases she has continued doing them.
She seems to think she is fine. Over a year ago. We moved to another country and she is scared to go out. However she has always been the stubborn type of person who does what she wants.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
My Aunt had angina for decades and lived a normal life to 96, just taking a medication -- as AlvaDeer said it's very treatable.
I also wonder if she's been in to her doctor (cardiologist) lately? What exactly is she worried about/fearful of or misinformed about? I don't think you'll be able to convince her until you know the root of her refusal.
You also say mom is "scared to go out" which is not something associated with normal "age related decline". Perhaps she's suffering from dementia which affects all logic and judgement in a BIG way.
From the Mayo Clinic:
Dementia symptoms vary depending on the cause. Common symptoms include:
Cognitive changes:
Memory loss, which is usually noticed by someone else.
Problems communicating or finding words.
Trouble with visual and spatial abilities, such as getting lost while driving.
Problems with reasoning or problem-solving.
Trouble performing complex tasks.
Trouble with planning and organizing.
Poor coordination and control of movements.
Confusion and disorientation.
Psychological changes:
Personality changes.
Depression.
Anxiety.
Agitation.
Inappropriate behavior.
Being suspicious, known as paranoia.
Seeing things that aren't there, known as hallucinations.
Best of luck to you and mom.
Does your mother have some dementia or is this just a matter of trying to "tough out" angina?
If she is diagnosed, then she HAS seen an MD about her chest pain, if I am right?
What medications have been prescribed, and do they work at all for her?
You say that you live with Mom and you observe her failing health.
Is it only this diagnosis of angina and its consequent pain that Mom and you are dealing with now, or is there more going on?
I sure do wish your Mom good luck. Angina is quite treatable; it's hard to imagine she would choose the pain unless there is some great underlying inability to understand this process or a great fear of MDs in general.
Hope you will update us. If Mom is competent in her own decisions there is really little you can do for her but tell her there IS relief for her condition and you WILL help her avail herself of it. Meanwhile it will be hard for you to differentiate between angina already diagnosed and impending heart attack, so do educate yourself as to symptoms by a bit of online sleuthing, and be ready to call EMS despite Mom in an emergency; let the EMS team assess her.
My aunt was diagnosed with heart failure and chose to not take any meds. She actually asked me to find a way to set up hospice. She pased within a week on her terms.
Speak to her without intense drama and ask her about her final wishes
I say this because my family has a history of heart disease and it’s important to see a cardiologist regularly.
Do you think that she would agree to an online visit? My doctor started doing online visits during Covid. I think in some cases she has continued doing them.
Best wishes to you and your mom.