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Since her recent move, the staff calls me constantly to ask me something or tell me that my mother is unhappy. Tonight, they called me to ask me how they can get my mother to sit up straighter in her recliner. They said she didn't look comfortable, and wanted me to tell them how to get her to sit up straighter. I didn't really know what to say...I said maybe ask her if she needed a pillow behind her back or something.

Is it normal for the staff to be constantly calling like this? Or should I talk to the nursing director about it? I don't mind a call if something is wrong, but how do they expect me to answer a question like the one above?

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Nursing homes are dammed if they do-dammed if they don't !!!
Give them a break, they need to know about the likes and dislikes about new arrivals, how their use to doing things, hobbies-reading and on.
Why is it a bother to inform them? Seems to me, all should be happy about their concern.
I took the few minutes to let them know Moms history and was glad I did--made it much easier on all concerned and of course much easier on Mom.
I get calls if her meds are changed or if she fell, no calls about her eating-sitting or stuff like that, they know.
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SURPRISED THEY EVEN CARE- HER CARETAKER MUST BE NEW AND IS OVER WORRIED- HOW SENSITIVE
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Since they are the professionals this is something they should be working out themselves. As a nurse who has worked in nursing homes I would not dream of calling family for such things. If they are going to worry you over every little detail then you do not need them.
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I also think it's weird that they're calling you about trivial stuff as this. We didn't get a call unless it was really serious. Like Beta42 said though, if the primary caretaker/employee that takes care of your mom is a rookie, then maybe. But even then she should be asking her superiors NOT you.
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Thanks for the input...I was thinking that it might be because she hasn't been there very long, only a few days. I will give it a few days to settle down, and then will have a talk with the nursing director.
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When my Mom first went into a nursing home, I told them about her likes and dislikes-her eating habits, personality.
Try that, maybe it will help them, sometimes the small things help the staff to aid your Mom.
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This is such a stressful time and this must just be adding to it for you. However, I'm having the opposite problem. I just put my Mom in one a week ago, and I feel almost like she's gone out-of-state to college (lack of control what's going on) even though I have been visiting daily. I wish they would ask me more about her routine/likes/dislikes. It's a really well-run place, but even though I've told them to call anytime with questions/concerns, they don't. She has issues especially at night and while I can't run over there to calm her down, at the Assisted Living place she just left, they would put her on the phone and I could usually do it in a matter of minutes. There has got to be a happy medium between being called too much and not at all. This is just hard stuff to deal with all the way around!
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Calling about pillow placement does seem over the top. I would think they would call family for the important matters, but this could simply be solved by talking to another worker or nurse I'd think! My mom too, is now in a nursing home...It has been 1 month. The staff is mostly very good, especially the nurses. If there is a question they usually talk to me when I come in (almost daily). But in a month there have only been 2-3 questions come up. Let things settle as you said and perhaps this will be resolved. I agree that it is a very difficult time...mom was living with my family and I was her caretaker for almost 2 years, but it became too difficult on many levels. At least I am not as stressed and I know she is being well cared for. But I miss her even though I see her most days! It is hard to let go and let others care for her.
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I think they are trying to be conscientious about learning your Mom's likes and dislikes. If, after they have had time to get to know her, the calls continue about relatively minor things, you may want to ask the staff about it. In the meantime I would chalk it up to them wanting to make your Mom as comfortable as possible in the manner that she is most accustomed and in the way that you would have done for her. I don't see this as an awful thing at all......
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You said this was a recent move. Once they learn what is 'normal' behavior for your mom they will most likely call you a lot less.
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