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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Most people in the early stages of memory decline are well aware of what's going on with them, and it usually is upsetting to them, so it might be a touchy situation to bring it up to her. Perhaps you can mention it to her husband instead, and see what he says about it, and if he notices the things that you do. Then you can take it from there, and even ask him what he thinks about you mentioning it to his wife.
I agree with funkygrandma- well said. Familial AD is rare but it does happen. It's noble of you to want to bring it to her attention. Does any of her other friends notice these memory issues? Is she married? Does her husband notice? Possibly having another friend who has also noticed this there with you when you see her could help. She, herself, may already be aware of some cognitive issues. You certainly could approach her about it tactfully.
We noticed small things with someone but so hard to pinpoint & very easy to blame work/lifestyle factors. My DH is his blustery way just said 'Do you think you are getting Dementia?' The person admitted they had been very scared about this for 2 years, had noticed changes, seen doctors, had tests, was taking supplements, was doing all they could. DH continued with 'Well we'll put you in a home when it's time'. So that was that.
I think many people realise their problem at the start. But being ready to discuss with friends would be such a huge step.
I need more info on a for instance or two. What are you seeing. Give me a situation. Short term memory is affected by a lot of issues, including anxiety. Stress. IF you are seeing profound changes you can bet others closer to her are seeing the same. I would have to be a very close friend to discuss this with my friend unless I am seeing profound change. Start keeping a bit of a short diary of things. When people do start on the path I agree they are often aware. But they can swing hard into denial because of fear. Would love OP to give a few examples.
One of my best friends had 2 parents who passed away from ALZ/ dementia. She asked her Dr for the test to see if she had the gene. Yes indeed she does, and she is 58. She is a worrier and going through some major life stressors right now ( front line HC worker, DD with mental / suicidal issues, GD to raise) So now every single thing that happens,, she thinks it ALZ. I think it's stress, and knowing she has the gene has made everything worse. Stress is a real memory killer.. and I do not have any plan to have that test! I have enough to worry about these days! So crazy these times are,, we are all losing it!
That's kind of like talking to a person about being overweight and going on a diet. They won't want to hear about it. You can talk to this person, but don't expect a happy outcome from that conversation.
My cousin is definitely going down the dementia highway and repeats herself all the time. But she's the type of person who knows everything ANYWAY, so if I were to ever broach that subject with her, she'd have a FIT and deny it. So what's the point? Since your friend is half of a couple, leave it to her husband to bring up the subject, since he's a lot closer to her than you are.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Care to share an example? Is this behavior extremely out of character for your friend?
We noticed small things with someone but so hard to pinpoint & very easy to blame work/lifestyle factors. My DH is his blustery way just said 'Do you think you are getting Dementia?' The person admitted they had been very scared about this for 2 years, had noticed changes, seen doctors, had tests, was taking supplements, was doing all they could. DH continued with 'Well we'll put you in a home when it's time'. So that was that.
I think many people realise their problem at the start. But being ready to discuss with friends would be such a huge step.
IF you are seeing profound changes you can bet others closer to her are seeing the same. I would have to be a very close friend to discuss this with my friend unless I am seeing profound change.
Start keeping a bit of a short diary of things. When people do start on the path I agree they are often aware. But they can swing hard into denial because of fear.
Would love OP to give a few examples.
My cousin is definitely going down the dementia highway and repeats herself all the time. But she's the type of person who knows everything ANYWAY, so if I were to ever broach that subject with her, she'd have a FIT and deny it. So what's the point? Since your friend is half of a couple, leave it to her husband to bring up the subject, since he's a lot closer to her than you are.
Good luck!